I heard someone say a while ago that if the Army wanted their men to have wives, they would have been issued. Army life is not for everyone, that is quite apparent. The women are expected to hold their head up high as they watch their husbands leave for months on end and uphold a certain amount of control. We can't fall apart. We are Army Strong.
There's a certain amount of strength that comes with the position, strength that comes seemingly from nowhere. Strength to go on with our lives, strength to get through another day, strength to ignore the media and tune out the goings on in Iraq.
People will say, "I don't know how you do that," or "I'm not strong enough to handle a deployment." In response I say that it's not something to want to do or choose to do, it's something you have to do. I would wait a lifetime for Hubby. If you feel that way, the strength comes as soon as they leave.
Behind closed doors, locked away in the minds of the Army wives, there is a certain vulnerability, defensiveness. Panic when the house phone rings at an odd time, fear when someone knocks at the door, disgust for those who talk down to you, dread when explaining the situation to yet another person, eagerness for homecoming, pride at the mention of soldiers or the red, white and blue.
Behind the strength of each Army wife, sadness is always in her eyes. A void in her heart. She may emit strength and pride, but behind the facade, there will always be a darker side, a pit in her stomach, worry and anxiety until he comes home. She makes it through each day with her Army strength, newly found on the day her husband left her behind.
In the end, the wives left at home are also heroes, heroes in a different sense than their husbands. They are the warriors of the homefront.
1 comment:
hi ashley! i was reading this and the similarities are crazy. i find people are always like why do you do this, i dont know how you can do this. it makes me mad sometimes because i tell them, if you had someone in your life who had this for a career, and you truly wanted to be with them, you would do it no matter how hard it was. Hey look on the upside, your hubby can call you, my boyfriend cant until he gets back into US waters. couple weeks left til i can receive those awkward hour phone calls :) i am glad to know i know someone going through all the same emotions as i am. hang in there lady. have a good evening :)
--Kate Fitzpatrick
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