The end is in sight.

I'm not really sure where the past few months have gone, but as I looked at my calender today and saw that it was January 17, I can't help but feel a little stressed. This job of mine sure has helped pass the time, and I often wonder why I didn't get one sooner! I am leaving home in a few weeks to head back to Hawaii to begin my life with Hubby. Looking back over the past 13 months, I can't believe how far we've come. So many things happened, but nothing happened all at the same time.

Around New Year's 2008, I made a list of resolutions and goals I wanted to accomplish while Hubby was gone, and I am happy to say that I met all of them. While I have done a lot since he's been gone, at the same time, I've felt like my like has been standing still. Hubby and I joke that 2008 is the year that never was. I always wonder how I'll explain 2008 to my children, a year on the home front, a year spent in good company, with great family and friends, but also a year spent away from Hubby, the first year of our marriage was spent a world apart. Either way, I will look back at 2008 as a year of personal growth. I think, today, I am a stronger, more independent person than I was 13 months ago. I know that if Hubby and I could make it through this, we can make it through anything.

There is still a little over a month until Hubby comes home. I often worry about something happening to him now, when the end is in sight. All I can do is pray to the Lord that he returns to me safely with no physical or mental battle wounds. As for now, I have a 'to do' list about 3 pages long and a packing list even longer. There is so much to do in between now and the time I leave, it's stressful just thinking about it. There's packing and shipping and paperwork and changing addresses and anything and everything you can think of. On top of all the stuff to do before moving, there's the visiting and hanging out with friends and family and acquaintances one last time before I head west.

In December 2007, I never thought this time would come. I had convinced myself that Hubby would get injured or wouldn't make it home. I endlessly worried in between phone calls and felt such relief when the phone did ring, I would, however, flinch when the door bell rang, someone called the house phone asking for me or I heard a knock on the front door. I was waiting for the bad news, which, I thought, was inevitable. I looked at the calendar and would could the months until it would all be over. With just about a month and a half to go, I still worry, but it does not occupy my thoughts, I look at the calendar and can't even conceive of being able to finish my 'to do' list in the short amount of time I have left at home and still manage to have some sort of life and see my friends and family.

Somehow, someway, Hubby and I have made it through the hardest part. I am so proud of us for accomplishing this feat, I'm not sure where the time went, I am so thankful to have been blessed with such a wonderful family and great friends, but I am glad to say that this deployment is winding down. The end is in sight.